Then and Now!
Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1967 - Vice principal comes over to look at Jack’s shotgun. He goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2007 - School goes into lock down, and FBI is called. Jack is hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.
Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1967 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.
2007 - Police called. SWAT team arrives. Johnny and Mark are arrested and charged with assault. Both are expelled even though Johnny started it.
Scenario: Jeffrey won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.
1967 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the principal. He returns to class, sits still, and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey is diagnosed with ADD and given huge doses of Ritalin; becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a learning disability.
Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1967 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is placed in foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist convinces Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself, and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has affair with psychologist.
Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1967 - Mark shares aspirin with principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - Police called. Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. Car is searched for drugs and weapons.
Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
1967 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college, and graduates.
2007 - Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given a diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.
Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, and blows up a red ant bed.
1967 - Ants die.
2007 - Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Homeland Security, and FBI called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates parents; siblings are removed from home; computers confiscated. Johnny’s dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Heather. Heather hugs him to comfort him.
1967 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007 - Heather is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in state prison. Johnny undergoes five years of therapy.
Ain't it the Truth! AND IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE HOW BAD IT'S GOTTEN......READ THIS TRUE STORY!
Dyslexic Student Expelled Over Toy Gnu
WATERBURY, CT - A fourth grade Oakville student has been expelled from a Waterbury school for bringing a toy gnu onto the property. The action falls under the school district's 'zero tolerance' policy, according to administrators. Officials believe the student, who is dyslexic, tried to intentionally break the policy.
"We're convinced he intended to bring a toy gun." said Meredith Simmons, Principal of Waterbury Elementary. "His reading disability may have confused him about what is prohibited in the policy, but we can't take any chances. That's why it's called zero tolerance."
The expulsion received full approval from the superintendent's office. "We support Principal Simmons' decision." said Milton Decker, Assistant Superintendent. "The toy gnu may seem harmless, but we can't ignore the underlying intent. I seriously doubt any of our students even know what a gnu is."
The student, who requested to remain amomynous, will be eligible for admission next year following a psychological evaluation and sensitivity training. The toy gnu was confiscated and destroyed by janitorial personnel.
Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God at www.God-101.com and the blog "Perspective" at http://God-101.blogspot.com
1967 - Vice principal comes over to look at Jack’s shotgun. He goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2007 - School goes into lock down, and FBI is called. Jack is hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.
Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1967 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.
2007 - Police called. SWAT team arrives. Johnny and Mark are arrested and charged with assault. Both are expelled even though Johnny started it.
Scenario: Jeffrey won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.
1967 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the principal. He returns to class, sits still, and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey is diagnosed with ADD and given huge doses of Ritalin; becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a learning disability.
Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1967 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is placed in foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist convinces Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself, and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has affair with psychologist.
Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1967 - Mark shares aspirin with principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - Police called. Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. Car is searched for drugs and weapons.
Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
1967 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college, and graduates.
2007 - Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given a diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.
Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, and blows up a red ant bed.
1967 - Ants die.
2007 - Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Homeland Security, and FBI called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates parents; siblings are removed from home; computers confiscated. Johnny’s dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Heather. Heather hugs him to comfort him.
1967 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007 - Heather is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in state prison. Johnny undergoes five years of therapy.
Ain't it the Truth! AND IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE HOW BAD IT'S GOTTEN......READ THIS TRUE STORY!
Dyslexic Student Expelled Over Toy Gnu
WATERBURY, CT - A fourth grade Oakville student has been expelled from a Waterbury school for bringing a toy gnu onto the property. The action falls under the school district's 'zero tolerance' policy, according to administrators. Officials believe the student, who is dyslexic, tried to intentionally break the policy.
"We're convinced he intended to bring a toy gun." said Meredith Simmons, Principal of Waterbury Elementary. "His reading disability may have confused him about what is prohibited in the policy, but we can't take any chances. That's why it's called zero tolerance."The expulsion received full approval from the superintendent's office. "We support Principal Simmons' decision." said Milton Decker, Assistant Superintendent. "The toy gnu may seem harmless, but we can't ignore the underlying intent. I seriously doubt any of our students even know what a gnu is."
The student, who requested to remain amomynous, will be eligible for admission next year following a psychological evaluation and sensitivity training. The toy gnu was confiscated and destroyed by janitorial personnel.
Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God at www.God-101.com and the blog "Perspective" at http://God-101.blogspot.com
Labels: humor satire, then and now
posted by Allan W Janssen | 12:18 p.m.
1 Comments:
i'll bet that kid thought he had a nug..........
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