- PERSPECTIVE -

- EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM! -

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Middle aged heterosexual, WASP male. Semi retired, semi-sane and semi-serious. And endangered species and I'm not going quitely!!!!

Friday, February 08, 2008

Letters, we get lots and lots of letters!

Here at the Perspective mailbox we get letters, we get lots and lots of letters, and I have to tell you that they have been keeping the staff working overtime for the past few days.

(So just like any other church, we have bills to pay and any offering or donation you could make through PayPal would be most appreciated. Otherwise I’m afraid we are going to have to lay off a few people....! See, We're getting just like the big time churches already)

But, down to business. The first item on the agenda today is that there is a new Quotation box to the immediate left and it is there for a reason.

Here at The Church of Allan we realized that God couldn’t really be a Him or a Her simply because of God’s non-corporal nature. (Part of our doctrine is that it is impossible to categorize or objectify God by God’s very unknown nature.)

But, we get a clue that makes God more personal and thereby familiar by Jesus himself when he said; (And this is one of the few things we know actually came from Jesus and not someone attributing it to him..... We will get into that “authentic says” thing at a later date!) He said; “Our father who art in Heaven, HOWARD be thy name!”

I love this quote from Jesus because it take an unimaginable being or force and describes it in such a way as to make it easier for us to put God into perspective!

(Get it: “Perspective” I didn’t pick that name for nothing.)

SO, FROM NOW ON IT’S CHURCH DOCTORINE THAT GOD WILL BE REFERRED TO AS HOWARD! (With all due reverence, of course!).

Anyway, back to the letters……... Remember I mentioned letters?.

I though it would be nice if you knew what a few of the people who read Perspective, (outside of myself and my staff of course) are saying.

First of all, Merry Johnson said; “Can't say I blame you for starting a common sense revolution! The world religious situation is getting pretty disgusting!”

Lesli B said; You're serious, aren't you! (Damn right I am.)

Janet H. had a more pragmatic thought; “I think I'll stick with my Baptist religion.” (Oh well, can’t win em all!).

Jesse J said... “You could do like Peter Griffin on "Family Guy" and start the "Church of the Fonz". (There’s always one in the crowd, isn’t there!)

Opps, I guess there’s two in the crowd, Michelle W. said; "I personally am a founding member of The Church of the Latter Day Cynics!" : ) peace

Then we get a little more serious and I have to start answering questions. From Maureen N. I'm interested...haven't read all of what you said but have questions already…….(The following is a quote from your humble author.) "We can look with awe and reverence upon God but the minute we put ourselves into the position of interpreters of "Gods Will" it seems to suggest a plot to twist all that is holy into a perversion of God's works."

"How can we revere God and not want to strive to do is will? How can we do his will if we don't try to interpret it?"

Maureen you have asked a question that goes to the heart of The Church of Allan’s doctrine.

Of course we can and should revere Howard.

BUT, because of Howard’s very nature, Howard would be unknowable. So there is no way to know Howard’s will. (And if you’re tempted to tell me “Because the bible tells me so,” then you should stop reading right now and go back to Sunday school.)

All we have had so far from religion are other humans having the arrogance and audacity to tell us that they know what Howard’s will is, and we had better listen to them! Or else!

And finally for today, we get this from Joseph R. "What’s your churches position on descent with modification by natural selection?"

Joseph is, of course, using fancy words to say “evolution.”

We have to start out with “First Cause” which is of course the big bang.

This did not just happen by itself since the Universe can’t appear through spontaneous combustion now, can it? Howard must have had a hand in that somehow. (The “laws of nature” were ingrained into the fabric of reality and evolution is certainly one of them SINCE IT HAS BEEN PROVEN, DAMN IT.)

Since then anything is up for grabs until we learn more about what’s going on with things, but I can tell you for sure Howard doesn’t interfere in the daily lives of humanity otherwise everything would be peachy keen..

(Like it or not that’s the way it is. Just like that old saying; “You cannot petition the Lord…… with prayer!” [Jim Morrison-The Doors]

I guess I have ranted enough for today so I will say “Goodnight.”

Allan W Janssen is the author of the book The Plain Truth About God (What the mainstream religions don't want you to know!) and is available at the web site www.God-101.com

Visit the blog "Perspective" at http://God-101.blogspot.com

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4 Comments:

Anonymous Joseph R said...

do i have to give up my sundays? ...more

Saturday, February 09, 2008 11:27:00 PM  
Blogger Allan said...

not at all. as a matter of fact I am considering a decree that we in the Church adapt the Christian, Jewish and Muslim sabbath's which would give us a three day weekend!

Saturday, February 09, 2008 11:28:00 PM  
Anonymous Tristan Russell said...

"Our father who art in Heaven, HOWARD be thy name!"

I thought God's name was Andy. "Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me..." ...more

Monday, February 11, 2008 1:59:00 AM  
Anonymous Allan said...

Well yes and no but since it's my church we go with Howard!

Monday, February 11, 2008 2:01:00 AM  

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