If I ruled the world!

The Janssen Manifesto

Part 1:

Here it is a Sunday afternoon and I have not been out all weekend because it is too hot! Instead, I sat in front of this damned computer, wrote in my own blog, and visited all sorts of others from literally around the world.

A realization slowly started to form in my feeble little brain that there are uncountable points of view on any major subject, with a particular emphasis on politics and religion.

Not only that, but the vast majority of people whose thoughts I read about on their “blogs” seemed to be totally out of their minds. (Or at the very least, seriously mis-informed about that of which they were speaking!)

In other words, they were full of shit!

This got me thinking about my dear old Mother who once said to me in a fit of pique and self-righteous indignation; “If I ruled the world, things would be a lot different!”

This sent me into a daydream about how I could go about solving all the big problems in the world and just for the hell of it, here I go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First, we might as well start with politics and close to home, which for me is here in Canada.

There are two big problems here. The first is Quebec and all their whining about how they are distinct and different and this and that.

It never stops - and they keep talking about getting out of Canada for a better cultural and economic life! (This in spite of the fact that someone, [Churchill?] once said; “The French are the greatest second raters in the world!”)

That is an easy problem to solve. We do not let them separate. We kick them out!

Separatists in Quebec keep telling the population how the province could do better on its own both culturally and economically. (Never mind that Quebec receives far more than it gives to the Federal government.)

They also would then be a country with 10 million people in a sea of over 300 million English-speaking people - and without the support of the Canadian Infrastructure.)

Could they pull this off? Of course not.

Just so there are no hard feelings - when they leave we will even give them Labrador so that they might find some more oil and minerals for their economy.

BUT, we need a connection to the Eastern part of Canada so we will take, (remember there are more of us than them) the South Shore to avoid partitioning the country.

For any non-Canadian who does not know, the South Shore is the part of Quebec on the south side of the Saint Lawrence River that extends in a small band from Ontario to New Brunswick.

This, by the way would also automatically solve the problem of bilingualism! There would not be any - so all the cereal boxes would be in English again.

The other problem is multi-culturalism. WE DO AWAY WITH IT!

Where the United States is described as a huge “Melting Pot;” Canada has stressed retention of national characteristics for recently arrived immigrants and this has led to chaos in certain parts of society.

When my relatives came here from Europe in the fifties it was a case of learning the language and fitting in with society.

The big thing was that you did it as a Canadian, and you did it according to the laws of this Country, not the laws of the place you came from!

These days everyone wants to pick and choose what sort of Canadian they want to be.

People from India want to join the Royal Canadian Police but insists on wearing their turban instead of a Mounties hat - on religious grounds. It does not occur to them that if they do not like it they just do not join. NO, instead we have to alter our institutions and customs to suit them instead of the other way.(Plus they would look like real assholes with a hat perched on top of their turban!!!)

Indian Sikh schoolchildren claim that they can take a dagger to school because it is their custom and religion from “Over There,” and why should they have to change just because they are “Over Here!”

Sikh extremists blow up Canadian airliners because ther are pissed about conditions back in India!

Muslims want to be able to impose an Islamic “Sharia Law” on their people instead of abiding by the laws of Canada, and when they are turned down, scream discrimination.

Then young Muslims and their families live here, collect welfare and all the social benefits the country has to offer them, live far better than they ever could have “back home,” and then plot to perform terrorist acts to further their cause of Islamic Fundamentalism. (A couple of dozen of them in Toronto of all places! What the hell do they have to bitch about the Canadian way of life.)

People come here, get their Canadian Citizenship and immediately go back to the country of their birth.

Then twenty or thirty years later, when there is ethnic or religious strife where they are living again, the first thing they do is plead with the Canadian government to bail them out and give them free passage back to Canada.

(As of this writing, it just happened again in Lebanon!)

SO,the solution is the end to Multi-Culturalsim, if you're going to be here, you're going to fit in here! Never mind the baggage from "back home, we don't need that shit"

There, that solved some of the major problems here in Canada. In Part two; we will straighten out the Middle East, and after that the rest of the World. Stay tuned!

Your Faithful Scribe
Allan W Janssen