The all-new Axis of Just as Evil!
Beijing (BN)- Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the old "Axis of Evil," China, Libya, and Syria today announced they had formed the new "Axis of Just as Evil!"
One of the former Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new Axis of Just As Evil as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."
Diplomats from Syria conceded they did ask if they could join the new -Axis of Just As Evil- but denied they were jealous over being excluded from the old "Axis of Evil," "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "Apparently an Axis can't have more than three countries," he explained, "This is not my rule, it's tradition!" In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret handshake!
International reaction to the Axis of Just As Evil declaration was swift. Within minutes, France surrendered!
With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Canada, Australia and New Zeland formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice - Just Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America.
Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis of Not So Much Evil Really, Just Generally Disagreeable.
Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics.
Meanwhile, wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious President Bush granted approval for most new Axis, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.
Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.
Your "on the spot" scribe;
Allan W Jansen
(With thanks to John Cleese for the original idea!)
One of the former Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new Axis of Just As Evil as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."
Diplomats from Syria conceded they did ask if they could join the new -Axis of Just As Evil- but denied they were jealous over being excluded from the old "Axis of Evil," "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "Apparently an Axis can't have more than three countries," he explained, "This is not my rule, it's tradition!" In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret handshake!
International reaction to the Axis of Just As Evil declaration was swift. Within minutes, France surrendered!
With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Canada, Australia and New Zeland formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice - Just Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America.
Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis of Not So Much Evil Really, Just Generally Disagreeable.
Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics.
Meanwhile, wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious President Bush granted approval for most new Axis, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.
Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.
Your "on the spot" scribe;
Allan W Jansen
(With thanks to John Cleese for the original idea!)
Labels: axis of just as evil
posted by Allan W Janssen | 7:08 p.m.
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