Religious Right Now Wants Unintelligent Design

The Religious Right has begun to change its tack in the battle over creationism versus evolution.

Stung by the proliferation of scientific evidence for evolution, public opinion polls running against them, and the transformation of Britney Spears from a slim chaste teen to a fat slut, leading theoreticians in the Religious Right are preparing to dump Intelligent Design for an new theory of Unintelligent Design.

“We were losing the battleground for hearts and minds.” said Don Wildmon, chairman of the Kansas School Board Associations. “So we needed a new pitch and a whole new campaign."

The group commissioned a lot of consumer research, which identified people’s fascination with wars, terrorism, natural disasters killing tens of thousands of people, NASCAR pileups, random violence and Donald Trump’s comb-over.

In an official statement Mr. Wildmon said; "People now have the feeling that the world is spinning out of control, and that they have no security anymore. They question whether the Big Guy is up there looking out for them, hence our new doctrine, Unintelligent Design."

Don Wildmon went on to say; "The idea is that the chaos on the world is all part of God’s plan and was put into practice by God's idiot Half-Brother Thor."

“We believe we are on are onto a winning marketing strategy," he said. "People are hard-wired to believe there is a Divinity and to blame the mess on an errant family member just seems natural."

Your "Biblical" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com