Correction!!

It is with extreme regret that I must confess we made a drastic mistake here on "Perspective" on Friday December 28th.

Despite the many safeguards in place to prevent things like this from happening, it was only a few days after Christmas and the first day back at work for most of the "Perspective" staff so I can't be too harsh with them.

The article in question was about my telling kids to be cautious on the Internet and I wrote about how that nice kid on the web could actually be someone like my next door neighbour Charlie, so they should be careful!

(Actually, in spite of his looks, he is sort of a nice "kid," just a bit weird at times!)

Anyway, I wrote the article and then instructed the copy department to add the picture of Charlie and then do the usual composition and production, but due to a labelling problem they put in the wrong picture!!!!

<-- This picture (which they put in by mistake) is actually a photo of Santa that was sent to us on the 26th of December by Mrs. Clause. (This was Santa's first day in Hawaii for his post-Christmas break and as you can see from his bare chest he wasn't used to the heat yet!)

I and all the staff here at "Perspective" sincerely apologize to Santa for any mistakes that were made and we of course in no way meant to suggest that HE was weird.

(Although I assume Santa has enough of a sense of humour to see it that way as well!)

Allan W Janssen is the author of the book The Plain Truth About God (What the mainstream religions don't want you to know!) and is available at the web site www.God-101.com

Visit the blog "Perspective" at http://God-101.blogspot.com

Bush gets it up the Ass!

Unfortunately, it was only a colonoscopy!


Your faithful scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 at www.God-101.com

Saturday Morning Confusion!

Here it is Saturday morning again and we have a wonderful bag of tricks for your amazment and delight.

First on the list is this little gem that any dog lover can't do without.

Diaper Harness for Doggies

The STA-ON diaper harness is used to keep diapers on dogs, whether young puppies, untrained adult dogs, or elderly incontinent dogs.

The idea is the invention of Dorrie Krenkel, who grew tired of diapers that kept falling off of her dachshund, Bucky.

The harness is intended to work with babies' diapers (you just poke a hole to pull the tail through), and you can get the harness in a variety of colors. They sell for $12.95 for the smallest size to $16.95 for the largest. "Puppy powder" for diaper rash is extra!

Shave Your Vagina in Sixty Seconds.
The "Bikini Line Genie" is billed as a protective shield that let's women shave their vaginas without fear of hurting the most sensitive areas, and prevents loose stubble from entering.

It works by tucking in between the labia majora to cover the more sensitive labia minora and clitoris, while blocking off the vaginal opening so no foreign material may enter.

It comes with illustrated instructions, may be used sitting or standing and works with any type or size of beaver.

FROM SALT LAKE CITY - SkyWest Airlines apologized yesterday to a passenger who said he wasn't allowed to use the restroom during a one-hour flight and ended up urinating in an air-sickness bag.

ST. PETERSBURG, Fla. - A 15-year-old girl who hiccuped her way through part of January and all of February is hiccuping once again. Jennifer Mee, who hiccuped close to 50 times each waking minute for more than five weeks starting Jan. 23, began hiccuping again Thursday morning after a nose bleed, said her mother, Rachel Robidoux. It occured during Mee's second day back at school since her first bout of hiccups stopped Feb. 28.

NEW YORK - A New York restaurateur has cooked up the most world's most extravagant pizza -- a $1,000 pizza topped with six sorts of caviar and fresh lobster.

Nino Selimaj, who runs six pizza restaurants in New York unveiled his Luxury Pizza, a 12 inch, thin crust topped with caviar, lobster, creme fraiche and chives. Cut into eight, it works out at $125 a slice.

"I know this won't be for everyone but there are people in New York who can afford it and once tried, they'll be back for more. It is delicious," said Selimaj, who moved to New York from Albania about 29 years ago.

"Sure, some people will say it is just a publicity stunt but I have researched this for over a year and think there is a demand. I have already sold one."

Selimaj said his restaurant Nino's Bellissima, which is the only one of his restaurants to offer the Luxury Pizza, needs 24 hours notice for the gourmet dish as it orders the caviar in advance. "But where better to experiment with pizza than in New York where people love their pizza," he said.

If diners are still peckish after the Luxury Pizza, they can always head over to the midtown restaurant Serendipity that sells a $1,000 ice-cream sundae called Golden Opulence which is covered in 23K edible gold leaf.

Your "all the news that fits" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Afternoon Delight (And then a nap!)

Since I am now in my fifties a bit of news out of Europe caught my eye and I thought you might find it interesting too!

It's sort of like a "seniors discount" for sex.

A brothel in Germany hopes to capitalize on the growing number of retirees by offering them a 50 percent discount for sex in the afternoon.

The "Pascha" in Cologne Germany has introduced reduced rates for clients aged 65 and above -- provided they can prove their age. "All clients need to do is show us some proof of age," said a spokesman for the brothel's managing director Armin Lobscheid.

(This is sort of ironic since we all start out in early adulthood by having to show I.D. and it seems we are ending up this way as well.)

Lobscheid went on to say,"A 'normal session' costs 50 euros with us -- and we're now paying 50 percent of that for these older guests because they are twice as easy to satisfy. We don't earn as much money, but we're establishing ourselves across a broader range of age groups," he added.

After testing the water with reductions for senior citizens once a week, the Pascha decided earlier this month to offer 50 percent off sex services between midday and 5 p.m every day.

"There's been plenty of demand and people have certainly been taking advantage of the offer," the spokesman said. "Older folks are more active than you would think."

"Life begins at 65!" it says in an advertisement for its "senior citizens afternoon" next to a picture of a motorcycle rider with a big grin on his face.

Now, I'm not saying I have ever gone to a brothel, (I haven't) but it is an indication of how our population is aging.

Thank God for Viagra, eh boys!

Your "get em up" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Religious Right Now Wants Unintelligent Design

The Religious Right has begun to change its tack in the battle over creationism versus evolution.

Stung by the proliferation of scientific evidence for evolution, public opinion polls running against them, and the transformation of Britney Spears from a slim chaste teen to a fat slut, leading theoreticians in the Religious Right are preparing to dump Intelligent Design for an new theory of Unintelligent Design.

“We were losing the battleground for hearts and minds.” said Don Wildmon, chairman of the Kansas School Board Associations. “So we needed a new pitch and a whole new campaign."

The group commissioned a lot of consumer research, which identified people’s fascination with wars, terrorism, natural disasters killing tens of thousands of people, NASCAR pileups, random violence and Donald Trump’s comb-over.

In an official statement Mr. Wildmon said; "People now have the feeling that the world is spinning out of control, and that they have no security anymore. They question whether the Big Guy is up there looking out for them, hence our new doctrine, Unintelligent Design."

Don Wildmon went on to say; "The idea is that the chaos on the world is all part of God’s plan and was put into practice by God's idiot Half-Brother Thor."

“We believe we are on are onto a winning marketing strategy," he said. "People are hard-wired to believe there is a Divinity and to blame the mess on an errant family member just seems natural."

Your "Biblical" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

Ain't It The Truth!

A brief Summary of Life
GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad,
don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back.
They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus. (!)

SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . having a drivers licence.
At age 35 success is . having money.
At age 50 success is . . . having money.
At age 70 success is . .. . having a drivers licence.
At age 75 success is . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.

Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.

Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.

Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*

Take the time to live!!!
Life is too short. Dance naked

Your "friendly neighborhood" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Even More Ways to Bug a Cat!

Here kitty, kitty, kitty! You can do it!

CAN'T BEAT THIS!

Beatbox
Uploaded by loranger

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

Give 'Em the Finger!

Here are the guys we talked about in the piece below!



Your 'undercover' scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Sunday Morning Funnies!

Let's kill two birds with one stone this week. Religion AND Humour.


Allan

Sunday Morning Funnies

A 6-year old and a 4-year old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6-year old. "I think it's about time we started cussing."

The 4-year old nods his head in approval. The 6-year old continues, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with 'hell' and you say something with 'ass'.

The 4-year old agrees with enthusiasm. When their mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6-year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets upand runs upstairs crying his eyes out with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step.

His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can just stay there until I let you out!"

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4-year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" I don't know!" he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios."

More ways to bug a cat!

This is the way felines get even for; "Ways to bug a cat!"
Your "ways be a bug" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Sunday Morning Funnies!

My daughter turned sixteen in the fall and like most kids that age she thinks she knows everything!

According to the results of these high school tests for sixteen year olds she may be right.

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain the process by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.

Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow. [He got an A]

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g. abdomen)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax, the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.

Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport

Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Cesarean Section."
A: The Cesarean section is a district in Rome.

Q: O.K. then! What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Your "Hail Caesar" Scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Here's Looking at You, Kid!

Ronald Dotson, of Detroit Michigan, has a strange hobby. Good ol' Ron seems to have a compulsion to break and enter places and was just sentenced to up to 30 years in prison for being a habitual criminal.

Ron's latest arrest came just a week after he had been paroled for his sixth B and E conviction in the last 13 years.

This by itself is not entirely strange, but where it starts to get weird is that all these burglaries were for the purpose of stealing mannequins!

His latest "heist" occurred in October after police in Royal Oak spotted him near a smashed store-front window with a mannequin dressed as a "French Maid!"

Police said they gave chase and found him in an alley behind a women's clothing store with three mannequins dressed in lingerie!

At his sentencing Ron yelled out to the Judge; I claim insanity! I'm just crazy about those mannequins!











Your "get em while their hot" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

SORRY!

Sorry, but I don't have a thing today!

Absolutely nothing struck me as funny, disgusting or stupid!

Maybe it's me, maybe it's Monday, or maybe the whole world decided to be normal for once, which I doubt!

So - it's gotta be me***********!

Whether I'm right or whether I'm wrong.
Whether I find a place in this world or never belong!
I gotta be me, I've gotta be me.
What else can I be but that what I am.

I'll go it alone, that's how it must be!
I can't be right for somebody else,
If I'm not right for me!
I gotta be free, I've gotta be free,
Daring to try, to do it or die,
I've gotta be me............................................................!

.............................................sorry, I got carried away!)

Your "Speechless" Scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

Sunday Morning Funnies!

I am starting a new feature this week. Sunday Morning Funnies!

News is depressing at the best of times so from now on, unless it's the end of the World, humour reigns on Sundays!

Let's start with a cartoon in the London Free Press about the U.S. wanting Canada to increase production in the Oil Sands by 5X!
(I told you we shouldn't let the States know Canada has the second largest oil reserves in the World after Saudi Arabia!)

Next, take my wife..please! No really, my wife is an ardent Scot and I have to listen daily to all the accomplishments of the Scottish people.

On that list is Robbie Burns Day, which is coming up on Friday.

Guess I will have to spend the entire week listening to how he wrote the words to "Auld Lang Syne!"

I don't know what the big deal is about a country where they have one poet and you can only play two songs on the bagpipes! (Stop squeezing and it wouldn't scream like that!)

Next we go all the way down under for a story about how an Australian guy is traveling around the Greek Islands:

He walks into a bar and, by chance, is served by an Australian Barmaid. As she takes his order, a Foster's, she notices his accent.

Over the course of the evening they get chatting. At the end of her shift he asks if she wants to come back to his place.

Although she is attracted to him she says no. He then offers to pay her $200 to sleep with him.

As she is traveling around the world and is short of funds, she agrees.

The next night the guy turns up again. Again he orders Fosters and after showing her plenty of attention, asks if she will sleep with him again for $200. She remembers the night before and is only too happy to agree.

This goes on for 5 nights. On the 6th night the guy comes in again orders Fosters but goes and sits in the corner. The barmaid thinks that if she pays him more attention then, maybe she can shake some more cash out of him. So she goes over and sits next to him.

She asks him where he's from in Australia.
"Melbourne", he tells her.
“So am I. What suburb?" she enquires.
“Glen Iris" he replies.
“That's amazing," she says excitedly, "so am I, what street?"
"Cameo Street" he replies.
"This is unbelievable" she says, her voice quavering;
"What number?"
"Number 20", he replies.
She is totally astonished. "You are NOT going to believe this,
she screams, "but I'm from number 22! My parents still live there!"
"I know..." he says, "Your Dad gave me $1,000 to give to you.”

AND, one of funniest stories I've heard in a long, long time!

This is a true story from the "Word Perfect Helpline," which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. This guy should have received a promotion, not get fired! Needless to say the Help desk employee is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination Without Cause."

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations)!

"Ridge Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
"Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
"What's a monitor?"
"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
"I don't know."
"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
"Yes, I think so."
"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
"Yes, it is."
"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
"No."
"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
"Okay, here it is."
"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
"I can't reach."
"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
"No."
"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle- it's because it's dark."
"Dark?"
"Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
"Well, turn on the office light then."
"I can't."
"No? Why not?"
"Because there's a power failure."

"A power...A power failure? Aha!

Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too fucking stupid to own a computer!"

Allan

Words to live by!

Excerpts from the book "The Plain Truth About God-101"
(what the church doesn't want you to know!)

I've found Jesus!
He was hiding behind the sofa the whole time!

I believe in God!
I just don't trust anyone that works for him!

“I look after the big picture, son.” Said God!
“Life is a crap-shoot. You take your chances like everyone else!”
-George Burns as God-

”Life is what it is!” –Anonymous

God inspired the bible, he didn't write it. People base their lives around the manic scribbling of a bunch of desert baked primitives who ate bugs and honey! Of course they saw God! -Anonymous

Muslims have their holy day on Friday, Jews on Saturday and Christians on Sunday. Since we are all "Theists" and "people of the book" it would be nice to find a way to harmonize all three beliefs. Aside from the obvious results of an end to religious strife, one of the most immediate benefits would be a three-day weekend!
-A.W.J.

The bible states clearly that nobody can earn his salvation through morality and good deeds (Gnosticism) since we are all sinful by nature. We have the perfect catch 22 situation were only in the blind acceptance of Christ atoning for our deeds can we be saved. In other words, we are in a no-win situation against the so-called logic of the shaman; if we do not take his word for it then all is lost! –A.W.J.

When I look at the arrogance of Islam with the way they treat women and the brutality they exhibit towards others under the direction of their Imam’s, it seems very disturbing that a major world religion can exhibit such barbaric acts.
That is until we realize that Christianity is guilty of just as many, if not more infractions against humanity through its history. Islam is one of the youngest of the major religions and still rooted in its origins. Let’s face it, almost everyone in the six and seventh centuries held comparable views to what Islam does today, including the Christians. -A.W.J.

“Consciousness is the physical manifestation of God within us!” -A.W.J.

"Conscience is God's presence in man.” -Emanuel Seidenberg

If faith were the result of logical reasoning, we could expect that most intelligent people would by now be converted to one ideology or the other! –A.W.J.

A Hinduism and Zen truism: “A person is like a drop of water separated from the sea. To fall as rain, it considers itself distinct from the world soul. Then, through hill and dale, its destiny is to return to the sea!”

"I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.” --Lao-Tzu

You give but little when you give of your possessions.
It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
--Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

"The whole of life, from the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning."-Jiddu Krishnamurti (1895-1986)

I am approached with the most opposite opinions and advice, and by men who are equally certain that they represent the Divine will. I am sure that either the one or the other is mistaken in the belief, and perhaps in some respects, both.
I hope it will not be irreverent of me to say that if it is probable that God would reveal his will to others on a point so connected with my duty, it might be supposed he would reveal it directly to me. --Abraham Lincoln

"I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure. That is all that agnosticism means.” - Clarence Darrow.

There seems to be an abundance of GOD'S on this planet. There is the God of Abraham, the God of Muhammad, and the GOD of Jesus. Then there is the loving GOD, the all-powerful GOD, the vengeful GOD, the GOD of grace, the GOD of peace and the GOD'S of war. There is also the “Holy Trinity,” which is actually “three for the price of one,” and even a "dead" GOD. -A.W.J.

”What can you say about a society that thinks God is dead and Elvis
is alive!” -- Irv Kupcinet

“If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators
would be dead!” --Johnny Carson

Sacred cows make the best hamburger. -- Mark Twain

“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.” -Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

"One of my objections to religion is that it prevents the search for
God.” --Arthur C. Clarke

AND FINALLY:

Perhaps the greatest sin of the Western churches (Judaism, Christianity and Islam) has been the particular brand of narcissism that impels so many to feel they have God all sewn up and put in their back pocket. People who think that they not only have a ticket to heaven, but anyone who disagrees with them is going straight to hell! They believe in God, but do not believe that God is bigger than their own theology. In their arrogance they do not realized that God is not theirs to possess! -Paraphrased from M. Scott Peck.

Your "That's all Folks!" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Fearless Predictions and Forecasts for 2007

Well here it is on the last day of 2006. Hope it was a good year and I hope next year is even better! What's in store for 2007?

After "much research" and soul-searching I have compiled list of stuff that should be relevant to us in the New Year! Some of it is obvious, some of it just makes sense and some is out in left field.
(Which is apparently also the position I play in the game of life!)

Social Networking: By now, almost every online marketer has heard of social networking sites (such as MySpace) and have figured out that they are most likely the future of media. Many online social networks started out small, and now a few are becoming a global brand.
However, marketers need to be creative in order to develop campaigns that integrate messages without offending those who don’t want to be marketed to.

Targeted Marketing and Digital Email: With the increase in social networking we will also see increases in targeted niche marketing. Improved email execution will enhance messages and make email efforts more relevant.
Soon, marketers will replace the plain HTML or text messages with dynamic content and include more strategic and forward thinking to make sure their emails get opened.

Online Video: Online content will continue to evolve, and will include more online video than ever before.
However, the right audience and the right offer need to be determined first, if streaming video is to have a big effect on sales. When the right factors are in place, results have shown as much as a 1,000% increase.

Vista will be the last major release of Microsoft Windows. The next generation of operating environments will be more modular and will be updated incrementally. The era of monolithic deployments of software releases is nearing an end.

Proliferation of RSS - RSS is a family of web feed formats used to publish frequently updated digital content, such as blogs, news feeds or podcasts. Users of RSS content use programs called feed readers or aggregators: the user subscribes to a feed by supplying to their reader a link to the feed; the reader can then check the user's subscribed feeds to see if any of those feeds have new content since the last time it checked, and if so, retrieve that content and present it to the user. (Did you get that?)

Blogging will Peak in 2007 and Start to Mature. In 2005, blogging and bloggers had fun, tasted the waters - some liked it and some moved on. In 2006, blogging matured (slightly). Blog Networks buckled down and started believing in themselves as a business - it’s time to take it to the next level, and that’s revenues. In 2007 … I believe the cream will rise to the top in blogging. (ME?) You’ll have your 10% of highly dedicated (and influential) bloggers, blogs and blog networks and the rest that will just plug along.

WAR: Many visionaries foresaw 3 great wars (WW1, WW2, WW3.) taking place in the same century and they were right. A lot of people don't realize that the "Cold War" was actualy WW3. In 2007 we see regional conflicts escalating, especially in the Middle East.

*US Lifts Cuba Travel Restrictions: Fidel Castro’s eternal rule over Cuba ends with his passing in mid 2007. Diplomatic relations immediately improve between the US and their neighbour to the South. Travel restrictions will be lifted, and Americans will flood Cuba. By the end of 2007, Cuba will find itself in a position to be one of the fastest growing travel destinations in the world while at the same time Canada pulls out of Afghanistan and invades and annexes the Turks and Caicos Islands.

*Housing: I predict a holding of prices in early 2007 due to sellers not willing to drop. Then we will see prices dropping in June/July, after a few months of increasing inventory.

*Hockey and soccer gain popularity. Why? Large flat-panel televisions. Fast-moving goal sports are hard to follow on small TVs. The action turns compelling on 50-inch or larger high-definition LCD or plasma screens. If you're old enough, you remember how boring football was on TV before color and instant replay. With their advent the NFL's popularity exploded in the 1960s.

ALSO:

*The blurring of the lines between journalism and entertainment.

*The blurring of lines between news and opinion.

*The blending of news and advertising, sponsorships or other commercial relationships.

*Recruitment shortfalls lead the Pentagon to hire temps to fill some positions and outsource some work to the Indian military.

*Jimmy Hoffa's body will be found in Elvis Presley's grave. Location of Elvis unknown - last seen in a Mall in Minneapolis!

*The problems and pitfalls inherent in pack journalism go to ridiculous extremes.

*I prognosticate and project that the the prolonged, professed and prohibitive tendency towards pessimism proliferates progressivly in profound proportians by profiteer's. In other words, the growing media fascination with the pathetic, the perverse and the pathological continues!

*Social orthodoxy, or political correctness will finaly start to wane.

*The next six months in Iraq will prove to be critical for determining how the following six months are going to go.

*Increasing strife in the blogosphere leads to the appointment of a Blog Study Group, which proposes dividing the blogosphere into three autonomous Liberal, Conservative and Moderate blogistans.

*An increasingly bellicose Switzerland announces plans to develop nuclear weapons to thwart the threat of North Korea.

*John Kerry repeatedly uses the n-word in a joke gone horribly wrong.

*Pictures of Rudolph Giuliani in drag will surface, scuttling his plans to run for President.

*Rupert Murdoch crashes his computer while trying to load a page in MySpace and angrily sells the company.

There you have it Folks
Your "Swami" Scribe
Allan W Janssen

What more is there to say after you've said it all!

(P.S. My wife just looked at this and said; "Oh Allan, that's rude!!)

Ain't it the truth!

This is one of
the main reasons
I stopped working
for other people
and went into business
for myself!!!















Your "don't look up" scribe;
Allan W Janssen