The top 100 reasons it's great to be a woman!

1.We can get laid anytime we want
2.We never have to buy our own drinks at the bar
3.We piss sitting down in case we pass out on the toilet when we're drunk -->
4.We get out of speeding tickets by crying
5.We get out of speeding tickets by showing a little cleavage or leg
6.We always sleep in the bed when we fight, you guys get the couch
7.We get to shop at Victoria's Secret -->
8.We can marry rich and then not have to work
9.We pout better (those puppy dog eyes always work!)
10.themWe always have food in the fridge
11.Men light our cigarettes for us
12.Men hold the door open for us ----->
13.We never have to pay when we go out on dates
14.We're cuter
15.We lie better
16.We're better manipulators
17.We can sleep our way to the top of the class
18.Men take us on all expense paid trips- all we have to do is sleep with them
19.We don't worry about losing our hair
20.We always get to choose the movie
21.We dont have to mow the lawn ---->
22.We dont have to take out the garbage
23.We dont have to constantly adjust our genitals
24.PMS- yet another excuse to bitch at men
25.Cosmopolitan
26.We can con our way out of anything - not just dig ourselves deeper into a hole
27.Men unlock our side of the car first- a real bonus when its cold
28.Men are like tiles, lay em right the first time ya can walk all over em forever
29.PMS is a legal defense for murder
30.We can masturbate more in a day than men
31.2 words- multi orgasmic
32.We dont have to paint the house or walls ---->
33.Sweat is sexy on us
34.We never run out of excuses
35.Doggie style - that way we get to watch the game too
36.We get expensive jewelery as gifts that we NEVER have to give back
37.You guys think about sex 200 times a day, but we could be having it that often
38.We get candy, flowers and jewelery all the time cuz men fuck up so often
39.We can give "the look" that will make any man want to cower in the corner
40.Women have more than one erogenous zone (in case you guys didnt know)
41.Women are cleaner
42.We're better arguers
43.We dont always have to think with our genitals
44.Massage!!!!
45.We're better parents --->
46.We never have to sit home alone on a weekend night
47.There's never a shortage of ready, willing and able men
48.Most women actually look good in short shorts- men DONT
49.When women get pissed we take it out on the world in general because we can
50.Menopause- thank god we're not capable of having children after we're 50
51.Menstruation- just another excuse to use so we can say "no" to sex
52.We just go to sleep after we masturbate because there's no messy clean-up
53.There is no penis envy
54.Men in uniform
55.It generally takes us less to get drunk -->
56.We have a higher tolerance to pain
57.We often get to cut in line
58.Better tips
59.We're flexible
60.Women who dont wear underwear are sexy and wild, when men do it, its disgusting
61.We don't embarass our friends or make loud bodily noises in public
62.Women can go a day without showering or shaving and not look or smell disgusting
63.We can connive men into writing our papers or carrying our books anytime we want
64.We dont have excessive amounts of body hair
65.We dont spend 45 minutes on the toilet -->
66.Men will pay us for sex
67.Smoking the seeds in marijuana doesnt make us sterile
68.We can throw a punch at a man and not get hit in return
69.Woman sweat less
70.Women smell better
71.We can have sex with an entire football team at once if we want
72.Men walk closest to the road so that if a car hits us, he gets hurt not us
73.We don't have to waste money on cards - a blowjob and sex fixes all
74.Men are more often serial killers, thieves, rapists and cheats
75.Women don't get the humor in the three stooges
76.We're better shoppers ---->
77.We don't get embarassed when buying tampons
78.Women have three accessible holes
79.We have better fashion sense
80.We're better gossips
81.Our friends dont pick on us if we arent sleeping with anyone
82.We dont have to make fools out of ourselves to impress a man -->
83.Men don't know what our 'girl talk' is all about (and I'm not gonna tell you)
84.We're all sittin on a gold mine- we know it and use it to our advantage
85.We dont have to drive when on a date
86.Women know how fake it
87.Women can use "that mark on my neck is from a curling iron burn" line
88.An oblong vegetable is all we need for a good time any night
89.Women look better naked ------------------------------>
90.We know that rhythm doesnt only pertain to dancing
91.Women never have to see combat
92.Women do less time for violent crime
93.Women dont have to worry about not being able to get it up
94.Women are sexier
95.Women's conversations consist of more than just "uh huh, yep, ok, then bye"
96.Women don't need an excuse to be in a bad mood
97.When women are short, we're petite, when men are short, they're just short
98.The remote control is not an extension of ourselves
99.An ugly woman can use makeup to become presentable - ugly men are just ugly 100.We can get laid ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, ANY WAY we want it!

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God at www.God-101.com

The top 100 reasons it's great to be a guy!

The top 100 reasons it's great to be a guy!

-Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
-Movie nudity is virtually always female.
-You know stuff about tanks.
-A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.
-Monday Night Football. -->
-You don't have to monitor your friends sex lives.
-Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
-You can open all your own jars.
-Old friends don't give you crap if you've lost or gained weight.
-Dry cleaners and haircutter's don't rob you blind.
-Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
-All your orgasms are real. -->
-A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex.
-Guys in hockey masks don't attack you.
-You understand why Stripes is funny.
-Your last name stays put.
-You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go.
-You can go to the bathroom with out a support group.
-Your underwear is $10 for a three pack. -->
-You can leave a hotel bed unmade.
-You can kill your own food.
-The garage is all yours.
-When your criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone secretly hates you.
-You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
-You see the humor in Terms of Endearment.
-Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.
-You never have to clean the toilet. -->
-You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.
-Sex means never worrying about your reputation.
-Wedding plans take care of themselves.
-The National College Cheerleading Championship
-If someone forgets to invite you to something, they can still be your friend.
-None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry.
-You don't have to shave below your neck.
-You don't have to curl up next to a hairy ass every nite.
-If you're 34 and single nobody notices.
-You can write your name in the snow. -->
-You can get into a nontrivial pissing contest. -->
-Everything on your face stays its original color.
-Chocolate is just another snack.
-You can be president.
-Flowers fix everything.
-You can wear a white shirt to a water park.
-You never have to worry about other people's feelings.
-You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.
-You get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours. -->
-Three pair of shoes are more than enough.
-You can eat a banana in a hardware store.
-Foreplay is optional. -->
-Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe.
-You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.
-You can say anything and not worry about what people think.
-Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk into the room.
-You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is coming by.
-You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid.
-Car mechanics tell you the truth.
-You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.-->
-You can watch a game in silence with your buddy for hours.
-The world is your urinal.
-You get to jump up and slap stuff.
-Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
-One mood, all the time.
-You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.
-You never misconstrue statements to mean your lover is about to leave you.
-You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.
-You never drive to another gas station because this one's just too skeevy.
-You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing.
-Gray hair and wrinkles add character.
-You don't have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment.
-Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
-You don't care if someone is talking about you behind your back.
-You don't mooch off others' desserts.
-If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
-The remote is yours and yours alone. --------------->
-Same work....more pay.
-People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
-You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.
-Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers.
-You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother.
-Princess Di's death was almost just another obituary.
-You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.
-Not liking a person does not preclude having great sex with them.
-You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom.
-If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, it's O.K.
-You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "F*#k it!"
-The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
-You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood.
-You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny. --->
-New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
-Porn movies are designed with your mind in mind.
-Someday you'll be a dirty old man.
-Baywatch
-There is always a game on somewhere.
-ESPN's sports center.
-You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries.

And just so there is no rioting in the streets from all the ladies yelling for equal time, 100 reasons it's great to be a girl is coming!

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God at www.God-101.com