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Saturday, January 20, 2007

Obama, Banama, Fanama. Fe, Fi, Fomama..........

Since I wrote a few days ago that Barak Obama had a good chance at the Democratic nomination and the Presidency, a smear campaign has raised its ugly head accusing him of being a "closet" Muslim.

I realize that religion shouldn't play any role in Politics, but it does!

Remember, there was a stink when the Republicans claimed John Kennedy was a Catholic and shouldn't be in the White House!

(How times change!)

None the less, this crap could have a definite influence on the election and I will now have to go with either Clinton or Edwards! (Too close to call!)

Your "Houdini" Scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Saturday Morning Confusion (Pt 2)

Actually it's Saturday afternoon but the title was too good to pass up!

Cows:
Global warming IS a fact in spite of what the U.S. government says!

Being a City boy when I grew up, (Toronto) I didn't realize the impact farm animals have on the environment.

Listen to this! ALL the pollution caused by cars on Canadian highways, (about 150 mega-tons a year) is only three times as much as the greenhouse gasses caused by COWS!

No shit! (Or should I say fart!) In the overall ecological scheme of things, that means farmyard farting is contributing about as much heating of the planet as 1/3 of all the cars, trucks and buses in the country!

This means that those cows we see out in the fields are responsible for as much as 5% of all the overall greenhouse gas emissions produced domestically from all sources!

We don't need to sign no stinkin' Kyoto Accord!

Just get rid of the COWS!

Iraq:
Now, from the fart-fields of Canada to the real shit-fields of Iraq!

More resisters expected.
Patrick Maloney: The London Free Press

George W. Bush's plan to boost U.S. troop strength in Iraq has ratcheted up interest among American soldiers about defecting to Canada, local sympathizers say.

And one London woman hopes any who do come north will consider settling here.

"If the people are here, they need financial support and emotional and social support," Beth Guthrie said. "We want to create a community of support for people who are resisting the war in Iraq."

This weekend marks a key anniversary in the 1960s-era exodus of young American men to Canada to avoid serving in the Vietnam War.

Now, in a quiet echo of an earlier generation's anti-war sentiment, the War Resisters Support Campaign is noticing growing interest in Canada as a haven for U.S. soldiers otherwise destined for Iraq.

The group that usually gets five inquiries a month has had "several dozen" calls from soldiers since Bush unveiled his plan this month to deploy an extra 20,000 troops to Iraq.

Racism:
An overwhelming majority of Canadians are unwilling to bend laws to make room for cultural beliefs. These figures a Canadian but American attitudes wouldn't be all that different in the long run!

The hard-line attitude is revealed in a Sun Media poll conducted by Leger Marketing, which shows 78% of people from coast-to-coast say everyone must respect Canadian laws -- even if they clash with the cultural values they hold dear.

"The legal system is the legal system, and for a lot of Canadians that's the rule of thumb we live by," said Leger VP Dave Scholz. "If someone is moving to this country, they need to learn the legal system prior to being here."

Only 15% think Canada should adapt our legal system to make room for religious and cultural beliefs.

When it comes to the law's role in curbing racism, only one-third of Canadians believe uttering a racial slur should be a crime. Another 46% believe free speech should reign.

While the poll has shown that an overwhelming majority of Canadians women have a problem with a woman wearing a veil..... lots of men however, insist that people of different ethnic backgrounds enrich their lives -one way or another!

"But if all that means is going out for ethnic food on a Saturday night, that's not really being enriched," Scholz said. "Enriched means embracing all the cultural traditions of the new population coming in.

Everyone's view of enriching is different, but from the results we've seen, I don't think it's entirely embracing all aspects of an ethnic community. It's sort of temporarily embracing it at times."

While just over half of Canadians see racism as a problem in their city, only 32% think a vigorous fight is necessary to combat it. Half of us would be willing to sign a petition or report a racist incident, yet less than a quarter would actually put up cash for the fight to stop racism.

Scholz said that reflects a "head-in-the-sand" approach to a real problem.

"Most people think it's a problem that's going away, and to that end we don't think we feel need to personally finance the problem," Scholz said.

"We can report it to authorities, maybe we'll sign petitions, but we don't actually want to put any real drive behind it ... We're not fighting it. We're trying to hide or avoid it, even though we're seeing and hearing about it."

Like I said, from what I have seen, I don't think the results in the States would be that much different. Of course, if you disagree, just click on the comments section underneath!

Your "pollster type" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Lymphoma Survival!

If you know ANYONE that has Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma.
Please tell them about this site. It could save their life!
My wife is a testament to this!

http://lymphomasurvival.com/ or go HERE !

Your "prescription" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Saturday Morning Confusion! (Pt 1)

Here it is, another Saturday morning with a newspaper and a few coffee's! As usual I was struck with a few thoughts, but fortunately none of them caused any serious injuries!

The first thing that caught my eye was good ol' Dr. "Dino" Kent Hovind. Remember him?

He is the guy that has a "Creationist" theme park that shows dinosaurs and humans living side by side about 4-5000 years ago and is a great hit with the "Right Wing Christian Fundamentalists!"

Well the poor Doctor and his wife just got themselves 10 years in the slammer yesterday for playing around with their income taxes.

(Actually, they didn't play around with them, they just sort of "forgot" about them! ------Watch this, good seguay coming up here!)

Speaking of "Doctor:" Hovind was awarded a Master's degree and doctorate in "Christian Education" through correspondence from the unaccredited Patriot University (now Patriot Bible University) in Colorado.

Dr. Barbara Forrest, a critic of Creationism, wrote that Hovind's lack of academic training makes it impossible to engage him on a professional level.

Specifically, critics of Hovind have charged that Patriot Bible University is a diploma mill. The school's current policies allow students to attain Bachelor's degrees, Master's degrees and even "Doctor of Ministry" (Hovind!) degrees in months, rather than years, for as little as $25 per month.

Various criticisms have been made of his dissertation, including charges of incompleteness, low academic quality, poor writing, poor spelling, and ungrammatical style. (This on top of the fact that the guy wants to play with words and call it the "THEORY of Evolution" while he calls Creationism -- "Creation Science!"

Now the reason I am going into the stuff below is because Hovind is a good example of how the Extreme-Right thinks!

His thoughts are sytemic of how the United States is going wrong in not only it's attitudes, but also it's foreign and domestic policy. After all, the Right does have undue influence on things at the moment! (If you don't believe me read the article below on how the Right thinks it's the "Liberal Left" that is responsible for 9/11!)

In other words, some of his beliefs are shared by a good percentage of the American population and they are not doing themselves any favours by holding these views.


At least that's the opinion of someone quite close to, but still able to maintain an objective viewpoint of the States! (A Canadian!)

Creation Science Evangelism Ministry:

After receiving his first correspondence education degree, Hovind started Creation Science Evangelism Ministry in 1989.

The ministry aims to evangelize people by teaching them a creationist perspective.

The ministry is not a non-profit organization nor is it considered a church by people who work there or the IRS.

The Hovind Theory:

Hovind summarizes his highly controversial version of the argument for Creationism into the “Hovind Theory."

The theory includes a literal reading of the Biblical account of Noah: Noah's family and two of every animal (including dinosaurs) safely boarded the Ark before a minus 300° Fahrenheit ice meteor came flying toward the Earth and broke up in space.













Some of the meteor fragments became rings and others caused the impact craters on the moon and some of the planets. The remaining ice fragments fell to the North and South Poles of the earth. The resulting "super-cold snow" fell near the poles, burying the Mammoths standing up.

Ice on the North and South Pole cracked the crust of the earth releasing the fountains of the deep, which in turn caused certain glacier effects.

This also made "the earth wobble around for a few thousand years" and it made the crust collapse.

During the first few months of the flood, the dead animals and plants got buried and became coal if they were plants and oil if they were animals.

The last few months of the flood included geological instability when the plates shifted. This period saw the formation of both ocean basins and mountain ranges and the resulting water run-off caused incredible erosion!!!!

Hovind claims that the Grand Canyon was formed in a couple of weeks during this time.

After a few hundred years, the ice caps slowly melted back, retreating to their current size and the ocean levels increased, creating the continental shelves.

The deeper oceans absorbed much of the carbon dioxide in earth’s atmosphere and thus allowed greater amounts of radiation to reach the earth's surface.

As a result, human lifespans were shortened considerably from the pre-flood days.

Now I should mention here that the vast majority of scientists do not take Hovind's work seriously and do not agree with his interpretation of the facts. But, if you're one of the people I should be mentioning this to, then you really shouldn't be reading this article anyways!

Dinosaur Adventure Land:

In 2001 Hovind started Dinosaur Adventure Land, a young earth creationist theme park located behind Hovind's home in Pensacola, Florida.

The park depicts humans and dinosaurs co-existing in the last 4-6,000 years, and also contains a depiction of the Loch Ness monster.

The park does not explore "The Jurassic and Cretaceous eras," but rather, "depicts dinosaurs as coexisting with human beings."

Legal problems:

Kent Hovind has been in trouble with law enforcement several times. These have included assault and battery, falsely declaring bankruptcy, making threats against federal officials, filing false complaints, failing to get necessary building permits, and various tax-related charges.

In 1996 Hovind unsuccessfully filed for bankruptcy to avoid paying federal income taxes. Hovind was found to have lied about his possessions and income. He claimed that as a minister of God everything he owns belonged to God and he is not subject to paying taxes to the United States on the money he received for doing God's work.

"Since 1997, Hovind has engaged in financial transactions indicating sources of income and has made deposits to bank accounts well in excess of $1 million per year during some of these years, which would require the filing of federal income taxes."

In 2002, he was charged with one count of felony assault, one count of misdemeanor battery, and one count of burglary with assault/battery. In December 2002, the charges were dropped by the alleged victim - Hovind's secretary.

On June 3, 2004, the IRS issued tax liens of $504,957.24 against Hovind and his son and their businesses due to previous legal maneuverings to evade taxation by moving property between himself, his son, and other legal entities.

Hovind stated that he did not recognize the government's right to try him on tax-fraud charges.

Hovind is known for his debates against atheists, skeptics and scientists. However, some scientists like Richard Dawkins refused to debate Creationists as they believe debate is not how science works.

Others like evolutionary biologist Massimo Pigliucci have debated Hovind, and were surprised how ignorant Hovind was of evolutionary theory. Pigliucci was surprised to hear to Hovind try "to convince the audience that evolutionists believe humans came from rocks" and claimed biologists believe humans "evolved from bananas."

In Hovind's debates, he traditionally focuses on points that he claims serve to discredit evolutionary theory, physical cosmology, and geology. He also presents what he claims is evidence for a Biblical flood, a young earth, and the canopy (crust) theory.

Hovind's $250,000 offer:
Since at least 1999 the good "Doctor" has said; "I have a standing offer of $250,000 to anyone who can give any empirical evidence (scientific proof) for evolution. My $250,000 offer demonstrates that the hypothesis of evolution is nothing more than a belief.

I have to inject a personal note here! I myself, sent Hovind a letter a few years ago in which I think I pretty well established the "fact" of evolution. Not only did I not get my $250,000 bucks - he didn't even bother to reply!

Controversial remarks:
Kent Hovind has made controversial remarks regarding conspiracies, science, creation, equal rights, religion and government over the years.

Hovind considers the King James Version of the Bible to be the Inerrant word of God that must be taken literally. Because of this, he believes all findings of science will eventually be found to agree with Scripture.

Hovind maintains that biology textbooks are lying and advocates simply taking evolution out of the textbooks because he considers evolution to be a false-religion.

Hovind has several conspiracy theories about the U.S. government. For example, he believes that Laetrile works and teaches that the US government is conspiring to suppress a cure for cancer.

On his radio program that he claims the U.S. government was behind the 9/11 attacks and that a "lot of folks were told not to come to work."

He also believes the Oklahoma City bombing was done on purpose. To quote the good Doctor; "Did you know the Federal Government blew up their own building to blame it on the militias, and to get rid of some people that weren't cooperating with the system?"

He also alleges that "UFOs are apparitions of Satan" and that the US government possesses UFOs.

Additionally, Hovind believes that the Federal Reserve, the Council on Foreign Relations, the United Nations, and various other groups are actively planning to create a one world government.

He also claims that the 1993 World Trade Center attack was staged by the U.S. Government in order to pass "anti-terrorism" legislation that restricts civil liberties.

He says, "I love my country, but fear my government. And you should too."

Jesus Christ, that's exactly what I keep saying about mainstream religion!

In terms of science, Hovind disregards all fossil evidence, claiming; "No fossils can count as evidence for evolution because all we know about that animal is that it died. We do not know that it had any kids, much less different kids!"

During a debate with Farrell Till, Hovind made the following claim about Donald Johanson: "He found the leg bones of "Lucy" a mile and a half away from the head bones. The leg bones were 200 feet deeper in a deeper layer of strata. I would like to know how fast the train was going that hit that chimpanzee."

However, the claim itself is false, and while Hovind has been informed of this, he continues to make it.

He also claims the Grand Canyon was not created through gradual geologic processes but rather by the Great Flood as narrated in the Old Testament.

I could go on about this asshole but I think you get the general idea.

As for the systemic problems in the United States, Hovind gives us a few good examples of what not to do!

Basically it boils down to throw away your "bibles" and your conspiracy theories and start looking at what makes sense. Period!

And that's all I have to say about that!!!!!!!

Your scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

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Friday, January 19, 2007

Heaven Help Us!

I was listening to a program on the radio this morning about a Christian Minister who was giving a sermon about "Muslim Jihad!"

You and I are well aware, in other words we both know, that the Muslim's idea of Paradise, with 72 Virgin's waiting for him upon arrival, is not only a bunch of sexist garbage, I would go so far as
to say it is a bunch of God Damned Crap.

Or, to put it another way, "The guy must be a complete and utter Moron to believe something like that!"

But, what about the Christians amongst us??? Think about it!

Are you going to "Heaven," and all you have to do is believe in, and accept, Jesus Christ as your personal saviour!

Nothing else, just do as your told and Heaven awaits you!

Could that possibly be as dumb an idea as the 72 Virgin's scam?

Believe in GOD my freinds, because a Universe as great and wonderful as this did not happen by chance, but NEVER - EVER
let someone else tell you WHAT to believe!

They will fuck-you-up faster than you can blink an eye!

Your "Sensible" Scribe;
Rev. Allan W Janssen

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U.S. 'knew damn well' Arar to be tortured! - Leahy

CBC News pretty well said it all, so I will just give you this!

[CBC News] After sitting through withering criticism in a Senate hearing, U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales has promised more information on the case of Maher Arar, a Canadian who ended up in a cell in Syria after U.S. officials grabbed him on a stopover in New York.

Gonzales was grilled relentlessly on Thursday by Senate judiciary committee chairman Patrick Leahy. Leahy said that when Arar — a citizen of both Canada and Syria travelling on a Canadian passport — was detained in 2002, American authorities knew he would be tortured if they deported him to Syria.

"We knew damn well if he went to Canada he wouldn't be tortured," said Leahy, a Democrat from Vermont. "He'd be held and he'd be investigated.

"We also knew damn well if he went to Syria, he'd be tortured. And it's beneath the dignity of this country — a country that has always been a beacon of human rights — to send somebody to another country to be tortured.

"You know and I know that has happened a number of times in the past five years by this country. It is a black mark on us."


Leahy noted that U.S. officials claimed to have had assurances that people sent to Syria would not be tortured.

"Assurances," he snorted, "from a country that we also say now that we can't talk to them because we can't take their word for anything."

Arar, then an Ottawa-based engineer, was detained as a terrorism suspect, apparently because of a bad tip from the RCMP. He was flown to Syria, where he was held for a year.

In 2006, a Canadian public inquiry cleared him of any involvement in terrorism.

It was clear that officials from the administration of U.S. President George W. Bush would face a rough questioning on Capitol Hill after the Democrats gained majorities in both the Senate and the House of Representatives in the November 2006 elections.

Your 'capital hill' scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Hey boys and girls, let's get real here! If the Bush administration can tap anyone's phone at will, - what's a little thing like sending a foreigner to be tortured!

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

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Thursday, January 18, 2007

The Cultural Left and Its Responsibility for 9/11! How the Right uses "Newspeak" to deceive us!

I ran across something that absolutely floored me when I read it!

I try to remain a moderate but when I see either the Liberal Left or the Conservative Right put a totally idiotic spin on something, it never ceases to amaze me that people will swallow this shit!

Here's one for sure!

The Enemy at Home: By Dinesh D’Souza.(A Right-wing Republican?)
“In this book I make a claim that seems startling at the outset.

"The cultural left in this country is responsible for causing 9/11."

In faulting the cultural left, I am not making the absurd accusation that this group blew up the World Trade Center and the Pentagon!

I am saying that the cultural left and its allies in Congress, the Media, Hollywood and the Universities are the primary cause of the volcano of anger toward America that is erupting from the Islamic world.

The Muslims who carried out the 9/11 attacks were the product of this visceral rage—some of it based on legitimate concerns, some of it based on wrongful prejudice, but all of it fueled and encouraged by the cultural left.

Thus, without the cultural left, 9/11 would not have happened.

“I realize that this is a strong charge, one that no one has made before. But it is a neglected aspect of the 9/11 debate, and it is critical to understanding the current controversy over the ‘war against terrorism.’

I intend to show that the left has actively fostered the intense hatred of America that has led to numerous attacks such as 9/11.

If I am right, then no war against terrorism can be effectively fought using the left-wing premises that are now accepted doctrine among mainstream liberals and Democrats.”

Then an actual review of the book went on to say;

Whenever Muslims charge that the war on terror is really a war against Islam, Americans hasten to assure them they are wrong.

Yet as Dinesh D’Souza argues in this powerful and timely polemic, there really is a war against Islam.

Only this war is not being waged by Christian Conservatives bent on a moral crusade to impose democracy abroad but by the American cultural left, which for years has been vigorously exporting its domestic war against religion and traditional morality to the rest of the world.

D’Souza contends that the cultural left is responsible for 9/11 in two ways: by fostering a decadent and depraved American culture that angers and repulses other societies—especially traditional and religious ones— and by promoting, at home and abroad, an anti-American attitude that blames America for all the problems of the world!

PLEASE, PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT THEY SAY IN THIS!

The Conservative Right is attacking the Left by claiming that it's Liberal Left attitudes and decadence that so angers the Muslims and all the other Enemies of the State, and not the 'war-mongering' policies of the current administration!

(Here we have a situation where in the space of one day there are reports of the Left spreading false propaganda about the Right (See Grand Canyon Retraction) and the Right making claims about the left that it is itself responsible for!)

I would like to remind you of this piece from the book 1984!
I said earlier that the decadence of our language is probably curable. Those who deny this would argue, if they produced an argument at all, that language merely reflects existing social conditions, and that we cannot influence its development by any direct tinkering with words or constructions. ”

This use of Newspeak, according to Orwell, describes a deliberate intent to exploit this degeneration with the aim of oppressing the masses.
(That's you and me buddy!)



Your "Newspeak" Scribe;
Allan W Janssen
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"The Cultural Left and Its Responsibility for 9/11" I can't believe they would really have the balls to try and get us to swallow that, but you know what I always say; "Tell people something enough times, with enough conviction, and they will believe just about anything!!!!!!!!!!!

(Or, as Cheech and Chong said in their classic piece - "Rebuttal")
You're all Fucked!!

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Presidential Elections - Fearless Forecast!

Right from the get-go, I can't claim full responsibility for this since my wife is both politically astute as well as having a sixth sense about stuff like this. (She is very aware of how people think and feel!)

Hillary Rodham Clinton, as we all know, is the junior United States Senator from New York. She is married to Bill Clinton, the 42nd President of the United States, and was the First Lady from 1993 to 2001.

Barack Hussein Obama is the junior United States Senator from Illinois. According to the U.S. Senate Historical Office, he is the fifth African American Senator in U.S. history and the only African American presently serving in the U.S. Senate.

Although both candidates have a lot going for them, the missus herself and I came to the conclusion that Hillary is a little too severe and would scare a lot of the male voters while Obama comes across as very intelligent and educated and therefore possessing more of that certain "Presidential" material than Ms. Clinton.

In the final analysis, Hillary Clinton would loose out because the Bitchiness factor would cancel out the Smart advantage........ while Obama's Blackness would be compensated for by his Intelligence, Refinement and Education!

So, in the Presidential elections next year we both see John McCain getting the nod for the Republicans and (Here it comes!) Barack Obama in the running for the Democrats.

Now in the election itself we feel it will be Barak Hussein Obama with a slim victory over John Sidney McCain III due primarily to the fact that the electorate has grown sick and weary over Republican policies and the war in Iraq. There you have it folks, you heard it here, America's first Black President!!!

That is, if Obama can loose that middle name Hussein somewhere!

And don't say I'm playing favorites with the black guy over the broad........... Hillary got two pictures!

On a side note here I mentioned last week that I hoped the States never finds out about the amount of oil we have up north in the Alberta Tar Sands, but apparently they did, because I heard noises out of Washington this week that we should think about increasing our production about FIVE TIMES! (-5X-)
(Canada's oil reserves are 2nd only to Saudi Arabia's!)

Your "I told you so!" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Gand Canyon Retraction

I received this today and am passing it along to you. It concerns the article I did on the Grand Canyon and it's management!

One of the drawbacks to information on the Internet is that facts and conjecture are not constrained with the same caution that reporting by commercial news sources are.

This has the effect of playing loose with the truth at times and we as bloggers are more likely to get caught in plots to advance certain points of view or ideologies.

With that in mind I will pass along this retraction verbatim!

Some of you may remember the flap from a short while back resulting from a report issued by PEER (Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility) claiming that Grand Canyon staff were no longer allowed, under pressure from the Bush administration, to take an official position on the age of the canyon when questioned by visitors.

The story ran in last week's issue of eSkeptic, though it had already hit the blogosphere more than a week prior.

This week, things have changed. Michael Shermer, in yesterday's edition, published a retraction, saying:

Unfortunately, in our eagerness to find additional examples of the inappropriate intrusion of religion in American public life (as if we actually needed more), we accepted this claim by PEER without calling the National Park Service (NPS) or the Grand Canyon National Park (GCNP) to check it.

As a testimony to the quality of our readers, however, dozens immediately phoned both NPS and GCNP, only to discover that the claim is absolutely false.

Callers were told that the Grand Canyon is millions of years old, that no one is being pressured from Bush administration appointees — or by anyone else — to withhold scientific information, and all were referred to a statement by David Barna, Chief of Public Affairs, National Park Service as to the park’s official position.

Understandably embarrassed and angry, Shermer contacted PEER and ended up getting the run-around for a while. After all was said and done, he had this to say:

Then why did PEER issue that statement in the first place? In my opinion, this is why:

PEER is an anti-Bush, anti-religion liberal activist watchdog group in search of demons to exorcise and dragons to slay. On one level, that's how the system works in a free society, and there are plenty of pro-Bush, pro-religion conservative activist watchdog groups who do the same thing on the other side.

Maybe in a Hegelian process of thesis-antithesis-synthesis we find truth that way; at least at the level of talk radio.

But, journalistic standards and scholarly ethics still hold sway at all levels of discourse that matter, and to that end I believe we were duped by an activist group who at the very least exaggerated a claim and published it in order to gain notoriety for itself, or worse, simply made it up.

To that end I apologize to all of our readers for not fact checking this story before publishing it on eSkeptic and www.skeptic.com.

Shame on us. But shame on you too, Mr. Ruch, and shame on PEER, for this egregious display of poor judgment and unethical behavior.

Much the same can be said for "Let's get things back into perspective here!" I am as much at fault for just passing along a piece without checking the facts first and would urge all readers to remember this as an example of how easy it is to get the wrong information on the Internet. Whether it's inadvertent, or not!

Your "set the record straight" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Burkini!

Life is good and definitely getting better. The Middle-Class in the Middle-East never had it so good as they do in this day and age!

Two camels in every garage and a falafel in every pot is becoming the norm for today's modern Wahhabi or Bedouin and the next time you're about to go on vacation to the Red Sea or Alexandria with the family, here is the latest attire for today's independent, progressive woman! Yes ladies, it's the Burkini! A must have bathing suit that is the latest rage for the decadent, fashion conscious Muslim woman who wants to make a "splash" at the beach!!!

(Available at all leading Department Stores and Souks!)

Your "fashion maven" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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A Modern Man!

I might as well tell you now! I'm having an identity crisis!

I've had quite a few people e-mail me and say "What the hell is that blog all about?" "Is it a political blog, is it about religion, is it about sex, satire or what? What gives?"

Then there was Buffalo from the great Mid-West ;-) who said;
"You might want to linger for a spell to explore this ol’ boy’s blog.
I haven’t quite figured him out yet, but he is fair to middlin’ interesting!


And of course we can't forget Mr. A. Brown, amongst others, who gave us this quote; "I Enjoy your blog. I'm still trying to figure out what in the hell you're all about, but that is half the enjoyment."

To which I then said; "Don't try and figure it out, this is just some of the shit that runs through my head and this stuff is as much for my amusement as it is for yours!"

Back to him; "Well, once I can forgive you for being Canadian you will probably find yourself on my "Great Reads" list!"

I didn't really plan on having a theme for these musings, and maybe it's the British humour in me, but just so that there is no further doubt about it, here is what this Modern Man is really all about! Just tell your friends!



Your "what's he up to now" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Some of my favorite things!

A cowboy is driving his truck along the road!

He passes a restaurant where a sign says:

"Lobster Tail and Beer!"


He says to himself:

"Boy......... three of my favorite things!"





(With thanks to Minstrel Boy)

Allan

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Dateline: - Middle-East

A couple of incidents caught my eye in the last day or so about stuff that happened in the Middle-East.

Two Canadian teenagers accused of vandalizing public property in Israel, including a memorial to fallen soldiers, were released by police after claiming diplomatic immunity, Israeli officials say.

The vandals destroyed park benches, pulled down outdoor lights and uprooted street signs,and caused about $5,000-worth of damages.

Insp. Micky Rosenfeld, an Israeli police spokesman, said two Canadians, an American and an Israeli were questioned after police arrived at the scene.

The Canadians were, in fact, released as a result of their diplomatic immunity and therefore we couldn't question them or investigate them," he said.

Diplomats at the Canadian Embassy in Tel Aviv refused to comment about the incident although it seems obvious that the teenagers must have been the sons of Canadian diplomats.

"Destroying public property, public order, this is something that is a severe crime as far as we're concerned," Rosenfeld said.

If they are not able to be charged in Israel, then perhaps we should think about legal action back here in Canada.

I don't think that Canada wants the reputation of flouting local laws and accepting criminal behaviour from the Diplomatic corps, or their families!


On an even more serious note the investigation into whether a Canadian woman should face charges in Lebanon for taking her children back from her estranged husband is over and a decision is expected shortly.

Here is another case of women having either no rights - or at least reduced rights in the Middle-East. (She's damned lucky this did not happen in Saudi Arabia!!!)

Cedar Hawach, three, above, and her sister Hannah, six, are both Canadian citizens and have acquired Lebanese citizenship since their father took them to Lebanon.

Melissa Hawach and two foreigners who helped her could face Lebanese charges related to child abduction for arranging to take Hanah, 6, and Cedar, 3, from their father just before Christmas.

Melissa, who is originally from Saskatchewan, travelled to Lebanon in December to recover her two girls after their Lebanese father abducted them and took them to Lebanon without her consent!

Their mother has custody of the children in Canada. But their father, Joseph Hawach, argues that under Lebanese law, he now has custody.

The children have Canadian citizenship, but they have also acquired Lebanese citizenship since their father took them to Lebanon.

Melissa Hawach reportedly enlisted the help of four ex-soldiers from Australia and New Zealand, two of whom were arrested and are in a Lebanese jail awaiting the results of the investigation.

Meanwhile, husband Joseph Hawach has been in hiding in Lebanon.

Interpol has circulated an international warrant for his arrest and extradition.

He faces allegations in Canada of unlawfully removing the two children.



Your "Interpol" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Words to live by!

Excerpts from the book "The Plain Truth About God-101"
(what the church doesn't want you to know!)

I've found Jesus!
He was hiding behind the sofa the whole time!

I believe in God!
I just don't trust anyone that works for him!

“I look after the big picture, son.” Said God!
“Life is a crap-shoot. You take your chances like everyone else!”
-George Burns as God-

”Life is what it is!” –Anonymous

God inspired the bible, he didn't write it. People base their lives around the manic scribbling of a bunch of desert baked primitives who ate bugs and honey! Of course they saw God! -Anonymous

Muslims have their holy day on Friday, Jews on Saturday and Christians on Sunday. Since we are all "Theists" and "people of the book" it would be nice to find a way to harmonize all three beliefs. Aside from the obvious results of an end to religious strife, one of the most immediate benefits would be a three-day weekend!
-A.W.J.

The bible states clearly that nobody can earn his salvation through morality and good deeds (Gnosticism) since we are all sinful by nature. We have the perfect catch 22 situation were only in the blind acceptance of Christ atoning for our deeds can we be saved. In other words, we are in a no-win situation against the so-called logic of the shaman; if we do not take his word for it then all is lost! –A.W.J.

When I look at the arrogance of Islam with the way they treat women and the brutality they exhibit towards others under the direction of their Imam’s, it seems very disturbing that a major world religion can exhibit such barbaric acts.
That is until we realize that Christianity is guilty of just as many, if not more infractions against humanity through its history. Islam is one of the youngest of the major religions and still rooted in its origins. Let’s face it, almost everyone in the six and seventh centuries held comparable views to what Islam does today, including the Christians. -A.W.J.

“Consciousness is the physical manifestation of God within us!” -A.W.J.

"Conscience is God's presence in man.” -Emanuel Seidenberg

If faith were the result of logical reasoning, we could expect that most intelligent people would by now be converted to one ideology or the other! –A.W.J.

A Hinduism and Zen truism: “A person is like a drop of water separated from the sea. To fall as rain, it considers itself distinct from the world soul. Then, through hill and dale, its destiny is to return to the sea!”

"I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.” --Lao-Tzu

You give but little when you give of your possessions.
It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
--Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

"The whole of life, from the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning."-Jiddu Krishnamurti (1895-1986)

I am approached with the most opposite opinions and advice, and by men who are equally certain that they represent the Divine will. I am sure that either the one or the other is mistaken in the belief, and perhaps in some respects, both.
I hope it will not be irreverent of me to say that if it is probable that God would reveal his will to others on a point so connected with my duty, it might be supposed he would reveal it directly to me. --Abraham Lincoln

"I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure. That is all that agnosticism means.” - Clarence Darrow.

There seems to be an abundance of GOD'S on this planet. There is the God of Abraham, the God of Muhammad, and the GOD of Jesus. Then there is the loving GOD, the all-powerful GOD, the vengeful GOD, the GOD of grace, the GOD of peace and the GOD'S of war. There is also the “Holy Trinity,” which is actually “three for the price of one,” and even a "dead" GOD. -A.W.J.

”What can you say about a society that thinks God is dead and Elvis
is alive!” -- Irv Kupcinet

“If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators
would be dead!” --Johnny Carson

Sacred cows make the best hamburger. -- Mark Twain

“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.” -Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

"One of my objections to religion is that it prevents the search for
God.” --Arthur C. Clarke

AND FINALLY:

Perhaps the greatest sin of the Western churches (Judaism, Christianity and Islam) has been the particular brand of narcissism that impels so many to feel they have God all sewn up and put in their back pocket. People who think that they not only have a ticket to heaven, but anyone who disagrees with them is going straight to hell! They believe in God, but do not believe that God is bigger than their own theology. In their arrogance they do not realized that God is not theirs to possess! -Paraphrased from M. Scott Peck.

Your "That's all Folks!" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Not all heroes are people!

James Crane worked on the 101st floor of Tower 1 of the World Trade Center. He was blind so he had a golden retriever "seeing eye dog" named Daisy. She was with him on that 11th day of September, 2001!

After the plane hit 20 stories below, James knew that he was doomed, so out of an act of love he let Daisy go. She darted away into the darkened hallway.

Choking on the fumes of the jet fuel and the smoke, James just sat there waiting to die!

About 30 minutes later, Daisy comes back along with James' boss, who Daisy just happened to pick up on floor 112.

On her first run out of the building, she lead James, James' boss, and about 300 more people out of the doomed building.

But she wasn't through yet, she knew there were others who were trapped. So, highly against James' wishes she ran back in the building.

On her second run, she saved 392 lives.

Again she went back in.

During this run, the building collapses. James hears about this and falls on his knees into tears.

Against all known odds, Daisy makes it out alive, but this time she is carried by a firefighter. "She led us right to the people, before she got injured," the fireman explained.

Her final run saved another 273 lives. She suffered acute smoke inhalation, severe burns on all four paws, and a broken leg, but she saved a total 967 lives. Daisy was the first civilian Canine to win the Medal of Honor of New York City.

And now you know, "The rest of the story!"

Your "grateful" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Christian Values!

Opinions are starting to polarize in Europe concerning the head scarf debate and the influence of Islam on the population in general.

A Munich court on Monday upheld a ban on Muslim teachers (All two of them!) wearing head scarves in schools of the State of Bavaria under a law that says teachers' attire must be in line with "Western Christian" values.

A Berlin-based Islamic association had complained about the law, which authorities in the conservative-run state of Bavaria have used to ban head scarves while allowing Roman Catholic nuns to continue to wear their head-covering habits in schools.

The Bavarian Constitutional Court ruled Monday that the application of the law in the state neither violated religious freedom nor was discriminatory.
An Islamic head scarf represented a "deliberate separation from western values, and that is not compatible with our constitution," Wolfgang Bosbach, a legislator for Chancellor Merkel's Christian Democratic Union, said on television.

However, a lawyer for the Islamic Religious Community said some of its members were considering taking their case to the Federal Constitutional Court, Germany's highest court.

The Bavarian law forbids teachers from wearing clothes or other items during lessons that seem to express views "incompatible with the basic values of the constitution and its educational goals, including Western Christian educational and cultural values."

Personally, I don't care because as these three pictures prove, there's not really much of a difference one way or the other, is there!

But, this is another example of how repeated demands by a minority for expression of their beliefs and culture can lead to a backlash from the majority!

Ask the Jews, or the Blacks, or the Italians, or the Irish, or the Chinese, or the Sikhs, or the East Indians, or the Pakistanis, or the Native Americans, or people from Iowa, etc. etc!

It seems the only thing that will cure this is TIME!

Just as it did all the other times!

Your "Choir Boy" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

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Saddam!

Well, by now all the celestial paperwork for Saddam is done and he is either roasting in hell or cavorting with 72 Virgins!!

It all depends on who you talk to, I guess!

Your "hang em high" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Monday, January 15, 2007

Bush's pants on fire!

Joe Gandleman has a political blog down in "Amurica" that's called "The Moderate Voice!" He always has something of interest in it! I ran across this piece and would like to share it with you!
(His site is down the left side under "Stuff worth a read!")

THIS JUST IN from investigative reporter Andy Borowitz:

Bush’s Pants Spontaneously Combust..............
President’s Pants Catch Fire During Interview!


President George W. Bush narrowly escaped serious injury last night when his pants spontaneously burst into flame during an interview on CBS’ “60 Minutes.”

Millions of Americans who tuned into the CBS news program to hear the president explain his rationale behind sending more troops to Iraq instead witnessed a freakish incident of spontaneous combustion.

All seemed fine at the outset of the interview, with no hint of an impending inferno, but then Mr. Bush “opened his mouth,” according to one eyewitness.

As soon as the president began speaking, wisps of white smoke started to emanate from his pants region, and within seconds his trousers were fully ablaze.

As flames began to lick the president’s inner thigh, a stagehand could be heard in the background shouting, “Pants on fire! Pants on fire!”

The District of Columbia fire department arrived at the CBS studio minutes later and extinguished the President’s pants before the fire had a chance to spread to Andy Rooney.

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-Cal) said that Mr. Bush’s penchant for setting his pants on fire may prevent him from making future State of the Union addresses to Congress, since his pants might be in violation of the House’s new ban on smoking.

But according to historian Davis Logsdon of the University of Minnesota, the spontaneous combustion of Mr. Bush’s pants is not without precedent: “Donald Rumsfeld’s pants were on fire for the last six years.”

(Unfortunately photo's of Bushes pants on fire are not available.-ed)

Check out Borowitz’s so-silly-it-must-be-real book: Andy Borowitz

Your scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Sunday, January 14, 2007

Scotland - Great Britain's Quebec!

France lost the battle for North America hundreds of years ago but Quebec refuses to lay down and die! Much the same can be said for Scotland since this is the 300th anniversary of an increasingly dis-united union with England.

(The fact that my wife is a Scottish lass from Glasgow, and would be happy with this article has nothing to do with it folks!)

Back in 1707 the Scottish Parliament voted to accept the "Treaty of Union" with England which gave the world Great Britain, heralded the blossoming of the "Industrial Age," and made Britain a world power.

This in spite of the fact that during the Wars of Scottish Independence, (approximately 1290 - 1363) invasions led to periods of temporary English occupation of parts of Scotland, but Scottish independence was retained.

(Robert the Bruce,
King of Scotland,
after the uprising by
William Wallace - "Braveheart!")



In 1603 James VI of Scotland also became James I of England, but the Union of the Crowns still left the parliaments separate. Scotland retained its government but the struggle between the countries now became economic.

The Scottish and English Parliaments signed the Act of Union of 1707, both the English and the Scottish Parliaments were dissolved, and all their powers were transferred to a new Parliament in London which then became the Parliament of Great Britain.

Certain significant matters including Law and education remained separate from the English system, and the Scottish culture and languages retained some strength.

Although there was a new British identity taken up with varying degrees of enthusiasm, (an attempted re-branding of Scotland as 'North Britain' never caught on) the Scottish national identity remained strong.

Some of England's 50 million people grumble that Scotland effectively rules the United Kingdom and bemoan the abundance of Scottish lawmakers in high-ranking positions.

(Plus the fact that Scottish polling districts play in determining national elections, and the "Royal Family's favourite retreat" is still Balmoral, Scotland!)

Now, ladies and gentlemen, this is the purpose of the whole article!

Just as most Scots care little for concerns over liberty, democracy or nationalism, and claim the debate is really about taxation and the standard of living, so too should the people of Quebec be more concerned with the economic consequences of separation than the cultural implications. You can't have it both ways!!!

Your "political' scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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Snakes!!

Albert Einstein once said the most important question a human being can ask is “Is the universe friendly?”

Think of that for a moment. How would you answer? If you think the universe is truly friendly and supportive of you, this obviously has a huge effect on your perceptions and behaviour. The same applies if you think the Cosmos is hostile - or just indifferent to your fate.

On a first reading, Einstein’s question is trivially true. If you’ve decided, consciously or unconsciously, that the universe is friendly, your positive outlook is likely to be mirrored by positive responses from others, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy about your world being fundamentally good. You are likely to have more friends, job offers, etc.

Conversely, if you are suspicious by nature, or walk around with a cloud over your head, you’re not likely to be much fun at parties, although you may win nodding approval from fellow grumps. At the very least your life is likely to seem a series of disappointments.

This is pretty self-evident stuff. From Ralph Waldo Emerson to Dale Carnegie to Wayne Dyer, most of us have heard the drill: life is what you make it.

Well, as they like to say in political circles, perception is reality. Sometimes we need reminding how much our expectations drive what we experience.

Sci-fi author Michael Crichton supplies an amusing example in his 1988 memoir Travels. In the early seventies, flush with success from spinning his novel The Andromeda Strain into a critically and commercially acclaimed film, he bought a home in the hills of Los Angeles.

A friend asked him if he was afraid of the snakes. “What snakes?” the author asked. The rattlesnakes, of course, which his friend told him, come out in force during the dry season.

Crichton returned to his magnificent new home in a complete funk and didn’t have any fun at all. He just looked for snakes.

“I worried that snakes were sneaking into my bedroom, so I locked all the doors every night to keep the snakes out. I thought snakes might come to the swimming pool to drink the water, so I avoided the swimming pool, particularly in the heat of the day, because the snakes were probably sunning on my deck.

I never walked around my property, because I was sure there were snakes in the bushes. I walked only on the little path on the side of the house, and I peered around every corner before I turned it. But, increasingly, I didn’t like to go outside at all.

I became a prisoner in my own house. I had altered my entire behaviour and my emotional state purely on the basis of something I had been told. I still hadn’t seen any snakes. But I was now afraid.”

One day he saw his gardener tramping fearlessly around the property. The author asked if there were any rattlers in the area. Sure, his gardener replied, especially in the dry season.

Wasn’t he worried? The gardener shrugged and said he’d only seen a rattler once in over six years. He simply went and got a shovel and killed it.

Only one snake in six years? Crichton’s mood brightened. In rational terms, there was really nothing to be worried about. He sat by the pool for the rest of the day.

As the gardener was leaving, he told the author he could be sure there were no snakes on the property, because Crichton had so many gophers.

Gophers! The very critters that the recent homeowner had spent weeks setting traps for, trying to poison, and taking potshots at with his air rifle. All to no effect whatever. “Each morning fresh gopher burrows crisscrossed my lawn. It was extremely frustrating. My house looked like National Gopher Park.”

Crichton began to rethink how to deal with the tunneling terrors, and eventually the gophers’ mortal enemies came to mind. “Was there anything I could do to attract rattlesnakes to my house? Put out some favourite rattlesnake food, or some dishes of water?”

Thinking back on his conceptual gymnastics over pest problems, Crichton realized he went through a whole series of changes without ever actually seeing a snake. “I felt different only because I had shifted perspectives,” he noted, at one moment hating gophers, the next fearing snakes, the next hating gophers even more and wishing for more snakes.

“Each shift in perspective was accompanied by a total change in my attitudes, the physiology, my behaviour, my emotions. I was immediately and wholly modified by each new perspective that I adopted.”

If a person can change their mind-body state that radically over something as mundane as snakes and gophers, imagine what choosing between a friendly or unfriendly universe might mean to their state of being.

Your "neutral" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

Allan W Janssen is the author of The Plain Truth About God-101 (what the church doesn't want you to know!) www.God-101.com

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Grand Canyon (Pt. 2)

As a follow-up to the article I did a few weeks ago on the "Creationist" view that the Grand Canyon was caused by Noah's Flood I ran across this piece
Washington, DC -- The Bush Administration has decided that it will stand by its approval for a book claiming the Grand Canyon was created by Noah's flood rather than by geologic forces. The park is not permitted to give an official estimate of the geologic age of its principal feature, due to pressure from Bush administration appointees, according to internal documents released today by Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility (PEER).

Despite telling members of Congress and the public that the legality and appropriateness of the National Park Service offering a creationist book for sale at Grand Canyon museums and bookstores was "under review at the national level by several offices," no such review took place, according to materials obtained by PEER under the Freedom of Information Act.

Instead, the real agency position was expressed by NPS spokesperson Elaine Sevy as quoted in the Baptist Press News: "Now that the book has become quite popular, we don't want to remove it!!!!!!!!!!"

(Yup, the flood did this all right, through solid rock and everything!)

Look boys and girls, there is one sure way to tell if it's real or if it's memorex. If science tells you something and gives an explanation then it's real. If religion tells you something and wants you to take it on faith alone, (In other words, something that makes you go WTF) then it's bullshit! See?

On a higher note ;-) the Grand Canyon does have another interesting feature and that is a new glass platform that gives a spectacular view!

Grand Canyon West, a destination owned and operated by the Hualapai Tribe at the Grand Canyon’s western rim, announces March 28, 2007 as the official public opening date of The Sky-walk.

The Sky-walk will be the first ever cantilever shaped glass walkway suspended more than 4,000 feet above the canyon’s floor and extended 70 feet from the canyon’s rim.



Access to The Sky-walk will run from dawn to dusk and will cost $25 per person in addition to the cost of a Grand Canyon West entrance package.

One hundred and twenty people will be allowed on the bridge at a time. Admittance is first come, first serve for walk up visitors; however, reservations can be made.

Guests will enter and exit the walkway via temporary buildings while the adjacent visitor’s center is being completed.

Grand Canyon West plans to issue numbered shoe covers – in order to avoid scratches and slipping - to each visitor that enters the open-air walkway.

One thing for darned sure! If you suffer from "fear of heights" this observation platform is definitely NOT for you!

Your "vertigo" scribe;
Allan W Janssen

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